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The World’s Biggest Penis and, Perhaps, the Most Perfect Vagina

This may be the first time ever that superstar mega-goddess Tera Patrick got upstaged by a big, fat penis. Well, not exactly upstaged – but the penis definitely took over the second half of the show.

The first half was all Miss Tera, calling in from her life as a mom, as well as her many other roles: producer, softcore model, burlesque dancer, cosplay enthusiast, animal lover. Amber, Savannah and Tera chatted about Vegas and next week’s AEE Show. They talked girly stuff, like which of them has the best ass. Amber described Tera as refined and “lady-like.” Tera complimented Amber fashion sense, recalling a dance routine in which Amber wore only a fur coat.

Perhaps the most delightful detail that Tera let spill is that her current partner (and father of their daughter) met her while he was taking a mold of her vagina for Fleshlight, to create her signature line of sex toys for the company. “I got shy when he was doing it,” Tera said and she knew that chemistry was in the air. Shy is SO seXXXy.

Tera also said that she hasn’t shot hardcore scenes since 2008 and currently shoots only softcore, à la  Andrew Blake. She does webcam; Amber pointed out that webcam really is the new format for porn.

Tera will make an appearance performing burlesque at a la Mode Thursdays, at 1 Oak in the Mirage Hotel, in Las Vegas on January 16, as part of the festivities around the AEE Show.

Then, after Tera, there was the penis. And NOT Robert Steven Rhine’s penis. Well, actually, it IS his penis, technically…

Rhine is the “deaditor-in-chief” of Girls and Corpses Magazine, the only magazine about death, comedy and HOT chicks on Earth, ever. Like a zombie bikini mash-up with a necrophilia chaser. And maybe unsurprisingly, lots of very HOT girls want to be photographed with dead, petrified, mummified, preserved things – hence, the penis.

Won at auction, Rhine claimed that it came from someone named the “Polish Giant” or something like that – just one of many strange items in his collection.

In a pickle jar, a huge, soft-looking, flesh-colored, vein-y, severed penis floating in some liquid. With the scrotum attached. Like those eggs you get in dive bars and a bloated braunschweiger shoved in a jar. No one asked why it was cut off, so Rhine will have to come back on the show and explain how a huge penis ends up without its owner in L.A.

Amber said that she thought it was bigger than John Holmes.

Not to be overshadowed by the penis, beautiful starlet Jayden Lee joined the show, especially to lapdance Savannah, who was in her black leather. An exotic mix of Asian and hispanic, Jayden is a native Spanish-speaker – that’s really seXXXy. Jayden got a kiss on the lips from Amber, which not even Robert Rhine got one of those.

He did get a lapdance, though, from very lovely Jayden. And then he took his penis and went home.

To listen to last night’s show, click here.

(Photos courtesy of EMM Report)

On January 9 – Ms Tera Patrick – SO SeXXXy HOT SeXXXy

tera-patrick-1050x1680We’re really proud to announce – on our next show, Jan 9 at 7pm PST – porn royalty Ms Tera Patrick will join us for some girly chat. Tera, Amber and Savannah will dish the dirt, only a week before the Adult Entertainment Expo in Vegas, Jan 15-17.

Tera is a sweetheart. She and Amber go a ways back. Tera is a beautiful woman, caring mom and partner, she loves her pets. And frankly, she may have the most perfect breasts on Earth – let’s just SAY IT – they are luscious, pillow-y, HOT, heaving mounds of woman flesh and we LOVE that. LOVE. Yummy yum yum!

Ms Tera also has an amazing following in the gamer world after an appearance in Saints Row II and she is into cosplay, which is really fucking hot. Like, imagine Tera Patrick in a plush, pink, furry kitty kat bustier and thong, Google Glass(es), 6″ heel pink vinyl Hello Kitty thigh-high boots, lots of diamond bling and an AK-47… and whiskers…well, you get the picture. AND she performs a sought-after burlesque act that involves a lot of seXXXy lingerie and high heels.

Oh – just fyi – Tera AND Amber and A LOT of legendary adult stars also will be appearing at the HollywoodShow.com THIS WEEKEND, Jan 3-5, at the Loews Hollywood Hotel. Don’t miss this opportunity to meet them in person, take pictures, get autographs and hang out with so many adult icons in one spot!

LISTEN to Tera Patrick LIVE this Thursday, Jan 9 at 7pm PST, on Rock’N’SeXXXy UnCensored @ LATalkRadio.com.

Pee Wee Herman Sends a XXXmas Card to Seka Every Year

That’s just one of the many amazing things we found out about adult superstar guest Seka tonight on Rock’N’SeXXXy UnCensored. Seka said Paul “Pee Wee Herman” Reubens is a friend and that they exchange yuletide greetings. Of course, Reubens also is known for being arrested at an adult theater – we have NO idea if he was watching Seka that day (or Amber Lynn for that matter) and we don’t care – Pee Wee ROCKS!

Listeners got a slice of p-star life from two legends of the XXX screen. Amber idolizes Seka. She described the pure platinum style that Seka created in the ’70s, which has been copied again and again by women who came to the industry after women like Seka blazed the trail. Seka explained that her career in the adult industry offered her opportunities to travel and meet people from all over the world. She has no regrets.

Local L.A. porn historian Bill Margold called in briefly to reminisce.

Co-hostess Savannah Jane was curious about how Seka got her name (she chose it after meeting a dancer with the name). While Amber and Seka were chatting, Savannah received several texts from friends asking for pix of Seka. Unfortunately, Ms Seka has a little cold and had to phone the interview in…

Seka WILL be in Los Angeles this weekend for the Hollywood Show, alongside Amber, a slew of adult legends and mainstream celebrities. Attendees can take pictures with celebrities, get autographs and purchase collectable memorabilia. Check out the website to see everyone that’s gonna be there. The Hollywood Show is being held at the Loews Hollywood Hotel, January 3-5.

Seka is so COOL – we LOVE that she was our first guest for 2014. Rock’N’SeXXXy UnCensored is off to a sizzling start, and it’s just gonna get HOTTER and HOTTER.

Special NYE Thanks to Tiny Biuso, Camp Freddy

1554499_10151818691881498_1324972239_nThe crew of Rock’N’SeXXXy UnCensored wants to give a BIG thank you shout out to Tony ‘Tiny’ Biuso, who was SO kind to hook us all up for Camp Freddy last night at The Roxy. Don’t tell anybody, but he’s the biggest sweetheart you’d ever want to meet.

The place was PACKED, the crowd was ready and the band went OFF, blowing 2013 right the fuck off the calendar. The line-up included Camp Freddy regulars Steve Stevens and Billy Morrison, Matt Sorum and Chris Chaney, and a spirited performance by Miss Courtney Love. Billy Idol was spotted backstage. Much leather, latex, lace, studs and silicone – and that was just Savannah and Amber!

Anyway, it was a great way to ROCK in 2014. We hope that Tony and T.S.O.L. also had a great night in Denver, with punk iconoclast Jello Biafra. Happy New Year everybody. WE LOVE YOU! Wishing everyone health and happiness in 2014.

BOOM! Rock’N’SeXXXY on the Night After XXXmas

1461561_10151807339006498_1525815889_nAmber Lynn and Savannah Jane enjoyed a delicious Christmas dinner at the Rainbow this year, then Thursday hosted a FRESH Rock’N’SeXXXy UnCensored with guests adult starlet/rocker girl Kristal Summers, and hardcore drummer for T.S.O.L. (and The Dickies and many, many more) Anthony “Tiny Bubz” Biuso LIVE in the studio!

Miss Kristal called in from her special XXXmas getaway. A real rocker girl at heart, a lot of musicians LOVE Kristal and listen in to the show whenever she is on. She was a HUGE hit at the porn star sleep-over that Amber hosted in the summer on her previous show. BLDrriHCEAAkhxtListeners were not disappointed as the girl talk turned to stories of stocking STUFFERS and who got the best BIGGEST toys and Santa coming down the chimney. Me-ow!

BOOM! Tiny made his entrance. He may have to change his name to Bizzy, as Amber found out from the mohawked Biuso. Let’s see – he teaches at Hollywood’s Musicians Institute and other music schools; he’s still strong with Long Beach cult punk band T.S.O.L. for a decade now; he’s starting a foundation for kids named after his trademark phrase BOOM (for Bringing Opportunity to Others Musically); and he also works with animal charities (reach him at bubblerama@yahoo.com if you want to help with the animals, too). AND he’s working on a video project with Riki Rachtman called “Fork in the Road.602568_10200911279241929_72186791_nVery funny, unpredictable stuff.

DAMN! And he’s playing this Saturday night, December 28, at the Roxy with Hookers & Blow. Not literally hookers and blow. Hookers & Blow are Guns’N’Roses Dizzy Reed and Quiet Riot’s Alex Grossi, and you never know WHO just might show up. New Year’s Eve will find Tiny and his T.S.O.L. brothers in Denver, CO, playing with punk rock legend Jello Biafra (Dead Kennedys). Never mind the legal weed, Colorado – slam in the New Year!

Anyway, probably the MOST important thing – because Tiny is 6’4″, mohawked, NYC Italian,  a ROCKSTAR, and a genuine sweetheart, both Amber and Savannah agreed that he is just really fucking HOT 🙂photo

The show wants to give a BIG shout out to our guests for saving some extra special Christmas cheer to spread with Rock’N’SeXXXy listneners.

Listen to Rock’N’SeXXXy UnCensored EVERY THURSDAY NIGHT at 7pm PST on LATalkRadio.com xoxo Listen to this episode RIGHT HERE.

Rock’N’SeXXXy Rings the XXXmas Bells with Camp Freddy!

Fine and foxy Amber and Savannah on Dec 21, prowled the Strip and stopped by the world famous Roxy nightclub for the holiday rockin’ Camp Freddy show. What can we say? Loud, LOUD music, smokin’ HOT seXXXy musicians, the place was packed! We don’t know what Santa’s gonna do, now that Camp Freddy blew the chimney right off the place. Oh, AND they’re doin’ it again on NYE!!

And, if you want to take home a little Camp Freddy for the holidays, check out their official page for a link to purchase their cover of an old-skool Christmas carol, “Merry Xmas Everybody.” For you last minute shoppers.

You know, Camp Freddy is a little like porn in that you never know WHO’s gonna show up. This past Saturday night saw Courtney Love, Billy Ray Cyrus, and Slash! Can’t WAIT for the next show, ladies and gentlemen…

Anyway, we won’t overwhelm you with words – we know you wanna see the pictures!! xoxo

Miss Weefer Says Don’t Forget the Pets this XXXmas!

weefer_XmasRock’N’SeXXXy UnCensored co-hostess with the most-ess Savannah Jane and her friend-to-the-end Miss Weefer want to remind all responsible adults out there that if you have room in your life for a pet, this is a wonderful time of year to adopt an animal. If you are considering a new member of the family for your kids or your sweetie, you might want to review this Petfinder checklist first.

You could really make a holiday miracle happen by choosing a rescue animal instead of one from a breeder or pet store. Here’s some contact links for local Los Angeles shelters and organizations that can help you find your new best friend:

L.A. Animal Service Shelter Locations

No Kill LA

Almost Home Animal Rescue

 

Naughty or Nice?

Santa hatsDo we really have to choose? Apparently, naughty IS the new nice if you measure the impact of increasing sex toy sales on adult manufacturers. Pipedream Products marketing rep Sabrina Dropkick, Amber Lynn and Savannah Jane (r to l) were transformed into happy elves by the Magic of Christmas.

We had a HOT debut show tonight!!!

Janine_Lindemulder_2010None other than the beautiful and notorious Ms. Janine Lindemulder stopped by, and Rock’N’SeXXXy was honored to have the beloved star on as the very FIRST guest of the show. It’s always great to catch up with your girlfriends, especially when your girlfriends are smokin’ hot porn stars.

Amber, Janine and guest co-host Savannah Jane talked about taking it on the road,  discussed dancing in clubs and spoke about the similarities between porn stars and rockers (Janine is currently dating a musician). Of course, as one Sunset Strip local used to say, rock stars and porn stars go together like cocaine and pancakes.

Belgian heavy metal band Channel Zero joined Amber and Savannah next, on a break from recording their latest album right down the street. The guys confessed their love for porn star Angie Savage, who appeared in their video for a song called, “In the City.”

PENEBLOO

And with Christmas only a week away, Amber invited two HUGE providers of pleasure products to help YOU buy that special SEX gift. First, Hustler Hollywood founder Theresa Flynt called in to talk about getting the biggest bang for your buck this holiday season. At their flagship Sunset Strip location (and more than 20 other locations nationwide) they have everything from stocking stuffers, to tree ornaments, to gay apparel. In the studio, Sabrina Dropkick from Pipedream Products was Santa’s little helper with a HUGE sack of goodies for Amber and Savannah. One piece that really STOOD out from the rest – the Icicles Candy Cane Dildo, made of solid glass. Warm it up or cool it down in water for extra fun. We want to be good, little pluggers here, so find Pipedream Products at Hustler Hollywood stores or HustlerHollywood.com, or at your favorite adult retailer.

Listen to the show episode here.